What Makes a Monster
by Jay Rease
Summary: "Monsters hide under your bed, Daddy… and in your closet!" He shook his head at his daughter.  "No Quinnie, the biggest monsters are the ones who hide in plain sight."  Darkfic.  Faberry Goodness.  Prompt Fill.  Please, heed warnings.
1. Chapter 1

Title: What Makes a Monster

Author: J Rease

Disclaimer: I own nothing but my crazy imagination. I now disclaim that all of my Gleefics are disclaimed until the end of infinity.

Rating: M/NC-18+

Spoilers: Show timeline applies, my head-canon will be obvious.

Warnings: Prompt fill—see prompt for basic layout of fic and all of its warnings. This story contains multiple forms of abuse, graphic violence, implied incest etc etc etc. You have been **warned** ahead of time.

Summary: "Monsters hide under your bed, Daddy… and in your closet!" He shook his head at his daughter. "No Quinnie, the biggest monsters are the ones who hide in plain sight." Darkfic. Faberry Goodness.

**A/N: After my last author's note (about flaming on the What Happens to Girls in Tiny Towns story), I've had an influx of praise, personal messages, and kind words. There have been no flames, and I have gotten to talk to a lot of readers who have read my Stealing Sunshine fic, and many of you all have encouraged me to continue. That being said; thank you for your support!**

**I've always been open to taking prompts from readers. It usually challenges me to take a different look creatively—with plots I haven't invested in myself. I still love taking prompts. I usually fill them personally and send a story to a reader who requests it. It gives me a chance to take my mind off the stories I **_**have**_** invested in, which I sometimes get blocked in, and it forces me to write something, differently. I decided to post this prompt fill from a reader and to also extend the invitation to some readers who didn't know that I fill prompts, or those who just want to chat it up. **

**So, send some prompts. PM, or instant message me on Aim (logophilegck), I'll pick five out of a hat or something and post them between updates. I'm enjoying writing the prompts I fill—and I don't mind filling a few more. Rules: Any character or pairing, any genre except blatant comedy (I can't do it don't force me to be awfully cheesy). Everything else is open. I love challenges, so you can add anything and I'll see if I can pull it off. Oneshots preferred, no more than two chapters. It can be written in any POV you'd prefer. No higher than an M rating. The possibilities are endless, and I hope a few more people send me something they'd like to see written. Those who've sent me things in the past- four of my posted stories are because of you, thanks for the great material. **

*Long Prompt is Long*

Russell returns to the Fabray house a "changed man". Reuniting with his broken family, things quickly settle into a familiar [Read; harshly strict] routine. When Russell catches Quinn in a "compromising" position (author's choice), he falls back into his abusive ways. Very angsty, very dark, and extremely graphic (because you do graphic, dark and angsty so well). Big bonus if it's revealed that Russy is really Beth's BioDad. I'd love to get a glimpse into the past of Lucy Q and her sister. However it can be left out if you decide to oneshot this fic. No Judy or Russel POV, please (although Judy can take any stance you choose). I'd prefer if Rachel found out, and tries to convince her to report the abuse. It can be others if you'd prefer (only fems—So Quinntana, Quinntina, Quinncedes or Quitt please). I'd love to see a romance, however friendship can work too.

*End of Long Prompt*__

This story will be completed in two chapters.

Please Read and Review

**What Makes a Monster**

They always called her Quinn. Even when she was Lucy; her family never called her by her given name. She was Quinn at home, even to Judy, Russell and her sister, Chelsea. She came home crying every single day; because of the names they called her. She'd run home and her Daddy would sweep her up and tell her that she was perfect; that she would always be his perfect baby girl. She could remember being afraid to sleep at night, and her Daddy would come into her room and make the bad things go away.

"_**Monsters hide under your bed, Daddy… and in your closet!" **_

_**He shook his head at his daughter. **_

"_**No Quinnie, the biggest monsters are the ones who hide in plain sight." **_

_**She screwed up her face. **_

"_**What's that mean, Daddy? Are you a monster, is Mommy?"**_

_**He smiled that all knowing smile and he wrapped his arms around her shoulders. **_

"_**Those mean children at school, they're monsters. All the horrible things bad people do, it makes them monsters. You don't have to worry about the shadows in the closet, Quinnie. They'll be gone by the time the sun comes up. But those real monsters, those monsters who get away with doing so many bad things; they won't get to you sweetheart. I won't let them, Quinnie… I won't." **_

She believed him. She believed her Daddy would do anything he possibly could to make sure the bad things would stop. He tried to stop the name calling, the pranks, and the loneliness. She began going to dance classes, (her Daddy said she would make friends that way) and she began working toward something she'd wanted since forever—to be beautiful. When her Daddy told them they'd be moving to Lima, she wasn't sad. She knew what she needed to do to finally be the person she wanted to be.

Chelsea Fabray was the model teen. She was pure and flawless and intelligent. Chelsea was her mother's pride and joy. But Quinn was her Daddy's little girl. She was his Quinnie. The same Quinnie who would grow into her looks, the same Quinnie who was the apple of her Daddy's eye. The same Quinn who walked into her Daddy's study and asked him for something she wasn't sure he'd let her have.

"_**Daddy, I want to get my nose fixed." **_

_**He stopped packing the box he was stuffing and glanced up at her. **_

"_**What? Quinnie, why? You look like me sweetie, it's the Fabray bump."**_

_**He put his hands on either sides of her face and shook her head lovingly. **_

"_**I love your nose, Quinnie. You'll grow into it." **_

"_**Daddy, I need a new start. I'm losing weight and I'm getting in shape and my braces are coming off, and Chelsea showed me how to put on contacts and—" **_

_**He frowned. **_

"_**Don't let your mother or your sister get into your head Quinn. You don't have to be really skinny, or have a perfect nose or—"  
><strong>_

_**Quinn pulled away, tears in her eyes. **_

"_**Chelsea has a perfect nose…" **_

_**He frowned again. **_

"_**Is that what this is about, Lucy Q?" **_

_**"Don't call me that, Daddy. I just want to start over. I want to be pretty and popular, and I want to have friends. And we are moving somewhere different and people won't know about the bad names or the jokes. I just want a chance to be happy." **_

_**He looked at his daughter. He looked at his daughter who had gotten so many of her traits from him. That stubborn little chin and that bumpy little nose. She was his world. He wanted to give her anything she wanted. **_

"_**Baby, are you sure? It'll hurt. And you're summer will be cut short and you'll have to break from dance for a few weeks. You probably won't get a chance to ever look this way again." **_

_**She was nodding vigorously at him. **_

"_**Daddy I did the research, and it'll be healed in less than a month, and I can be careful, and nobody will know… and—and I'm sure. I never want to be this way again. I don't want to be ugly anymore. And I just, I just want to be Quinn. No more Lucy. I want to forget about Lucy." **_

_**She was still crying, and he hugged her and nodded and told her how beautiful she was now. And if it was really what she wanted to do, than he'd let her. **_

_**And so he did.**_

That summer she tasted freedom for the first time. She felt uninhibited. And by early fall she felt invincible. She was pretty and she was mysterious, and she could be whoever she wanted to be. She let her sister dye her hair blonde, and they talked about all the things she could do to be on top. And she took notes. When her sister left for college that fall, she was ready to conquer the world. And she would take no prisoners.

And suddenly, she was _**beautiful**_. Everyone stared at her for a different reason now. People treated her like she was the most important person in the world. Boys fell at her feet and girls coward in her grace. She was royalty. But suddenly, her Daddy didn't have to be her hero anymore; suddenly, there were boys lining up to try to protect her from the bad things. Soon, Quinn Fabray became a woman.

"_**Quinnie, are you letting the boys at school… touch you?"**_

_**She shook her head. She didn't understand. **_

"_**Touch me how, Daddy?" **_

_**He was rubbing her leg, and smiling. **_

"_**Well, you're a woman now, Quinnie. You're a beautiful young woman…" **_

_**Quinn swallowed her face in her hands. **_

_**"Mommy told you! How could she? She promised!" **_

_**He began rubbing her back. **_

"_**She didn't have to tell me, sweetheart. I'm your Daddy; I think I should know when my little lady becomes a woman. It's okay; it's natural. But now that it's happened, there are some things you should know…about boys." **_

_**She peaked through her fingers. **_

"_**Like… boys aren't as smart as girls. They don't think with their heads and they let their impulses lead them. They want pretty young women like you to do certain things. And these things aren't something young ladies should do…don't let them pressure you into anything inappropriate. And remember always, God is watching, so don't shame him." **_

"_**Okay Daddy, I think I understand." **_

"_**Good, sweetie. I'm glad you do." **_

Things changed after that. Boys weren't friends anymore. And she found herself going to chastity balls and doing things because her Daddy wanted her to. She was smarter and prettier and better than Chelsea, and her Daddy always let her know that. And her Daddy always pushed. And she did anything her Daddy asked because he'd been her hero for a lifetime.

Then things got bad at home.

Chelsea had dropped out of college by the end of the first semester. She met a man and married him, and moved somewhere to open a chain store. Her Daddy was enraged. And he began drinking, and her mother never let his glass empty. They couldn't admit that they'd failed as parents. And they couldn't let it happen again. And she found herself in a chokehold of perfection and expectation. The fighting began. Judy and Russell Fabray fought over brandy or scotch three times a week. She'd sit on her bed and drown out the noise with music and homework. Suddenly nothing was good enough for her Daddy. He pushed even when she was on top, he shoved when she was an inch out of line and he made sure he would never fail again.

And suddenly he just wasn't her Daddy anymore.

"_**What is this, Quinn?" **_

"_**It's my chemistry test Dad." **_

"_**I can see what it is, Quinnie. What is this on top of it?" **_

_**She gulped. She hadn't expected him to be so upset. **_

"_**It's a B, Dad." **_

_**He stood up fast enough for her to back into the china cupboard. **_

"_**You're in high school now, Quinn. No daughter of mine is going to be a failure!" **_

_**She was cringing in the space between them. He'd never gotten this upset. **_

"_**I—It's not a failure Dad, it's only one test and I promise I'll do better next time, and I'm—"  
><strong>_

_**The only part of the smack that resonated was the shock. He never hit her. Never. She'd never gotten a spanking in her life and she really didn't want to start getting them now. **_

"_**Make your first try your best, Quinn. I won't stand for anymore embarrassment in this house. Are we clear?" **_

_**She nodded and asked to be dismissed. For the first time in her life, her father had been the one who did the bad thing. **_

Things spiraled after that. Every misstep was a failure, every boy had the potential to ruin her life; to ruin her family's reputation. The pressure was surmounting and sometimes her shoulders were so heavy with all the baggage her father gave her. Her mother started drinking more, and the nights got longer with their arguing. Soon, her mother just did as she was told. And when her Dad started beating her more frequently, Judy began ignoring the things that happened, choosing to just turn a blind eye and let her husband lead his family.

Her reputation became the only thing keeping her sane. She wasn't allowed to do most things girls her age were doing. Boys were taboo until sophomore year. She had to go to church and join the celibacy club. She had to be that perfect model child her father groomed her to be. And soon she was maintaining that perfect reputation. Finn respected her beliefs, and everyone wanted to be her. She was making her father proud.

Then Rachel Berry happened.

She was everything Quinn feared. She was naturally pretty and intelligent and she was _talented_. She didn't let anyone break her spirit and she had a _**future**_. All Quinn had was high school, a mediocre college and a humdrum future husband. Rachel Berry was getting away from the entire small pond of Ohioans, while Quinn would be there for a lifetime, pleasing her father and not living her own life.

When Rachel started pining after Finn, it was the last straw. And she put her reputation on the line and she joined the Glee club. She needed to hold onto everything she'd been working towards. She needed to keep her reputation. She needed her golden years to get her through what happens after. Rachel Berry always made her feel like she was as ugly as she used to be. Rachel Berry had been dealt almost the same hand as she was, unpopular, and friendless; but she was naturally beautiful. Things were slipping from her reach and she couldn't grasp why she was crumbling so quickly. And Russell noticed. He saw her toppling from the top of the pyramid; he saw lower grades and half effort. He saw her downfall; he saw her panic.

"_**Is that Finn boy pressuring you?" **_

_**She laughed nervously. She could never lie to him with a straight face. **_

"_**Of course not Daddy, he's a complete gentleman." **_

_**He quirked his brow and sipped his scotch. **_

"_**You would tell me if he was, wouldn't you sweetheart?" **_

"_**Of course, Daddy." **_

_**He swallowed the rest of his drink and looked at her for a moment. **_

"_**Just remember, don't do anything you wouldn't want to see on the front page of the newspaper in the morning." **_

"_**I know, Dad… I know." **_

_**She excused herself for bed moments later, changing into night clothes and slipping under her comforter. The knock on her door was so quiet she almost didn't hear it. But her father came into her room and quietly closed the door behind him. He sat on her bed as she flattened herself against the headboard, and stared silently at her before speaking. **_

"_**You wouldn't lie to me, would you Lucy Q?" **_

_**She pondered how drunk he really was. **_

"_**No Dad, why do you think I would?" **_

_**He was still staring; the look in his eyes reminded her of something she couldn't place. **_

"_**Quinn, are you being impure?" **_

_**She shook her head. **_

"_**Of course not Daddy." She was nervous under the unnerving stare he refused to break. **_

"_**I value my chastity, and I made a vow—" **_

"_**How far have you gone with him, LuLu?" **_

_**She didn't answer immediately. He never called her that anymore. The look in his eyes was getting darker as they sat. She needed to end this conversation before he got upset. **_

"_**I'm not having sex yet, Daddy. And besides, when Finn tries something, I make him stop and then we pray." **_

_**His face was twisting in conflicting emotions. First it was relief, and then a harsh, terrible anger. **_

"_**You aren't having sex…yet? And what does he try? What do you let him do?" **_

_**She was shaking her head, her hands pressing against his chest as she tried to calm him down. **_

"_**N—Nothing, Daddy, I promise. We just kiss. And if he ever tries to do anything we pray, we pray together Daddy I—"**_

"_**You're lying to me Lucy, you're letting this boy come between us and I can't stand for that." **_

"_**Daddy—I would never! Finn and I are being appropriate, I promise there is nothing going on that you don't know about—" **_

_**He stood on his feet and began pacing the room. He was rubbing his face slowly, stopping periodically to stare at her. **_

"_**Are you still a virgin, Lucy? Are you still my innocent little girl? Are you lying to me about everything now?"**_

_**She just sat still. Anything she said now would just be twisted. **_

"_**Take off your pajamas, Quinn." **_

_**The way he said it made her tense. It wasn't a question, but she dared her chances. **_

"_**W-Why , Daddy?" She needed to find reason. She needed to know she wasn't going to get a spanking for something she hadn't even done. **_

"_**Don't question me. Do it. Now." **_

_**She stood and slowly took her clothes off. She pulled her shirt over her head and her shorts down slowly. **_

"_**Take off everything." **_

_**She snapped her head up. **_

"_**Daddy, I swear I—"**_

"_**Do as I say, Quinn!" **_

_**She started crying. She felt the tears trailing down her cheeks, and she gave up wiping them away. She pulled down her panties and unclasped her bra. She shivered and crossed her arms in front of herself, and she waited for him to speak. He began circling her, lifting her arms and checking intimate spots on her body. He pushed a knee between her thighs, and grabbed roughly at the flesh there. He continued searching for something invisible, yanking her hands away from her breasts and examining the skin there. She turned her head and took a shaky breath, tears still falling down her burning cheeks. When he moved his hands, she faced him again and caught a glimpse of something sinister. **_

_**His eyes shot up to hers, and she saw it. She saw what the monsters were made of, she saw the anger behind her father's betraying facade and she couldn't prepare for what happened next. **_

"_**I'm going to get to the bottom of this once and for all." **_

_**He backed her into the wall near her bed, and forced her legs apart. He pushed two fingers quickly to her. And stopped only when he met resistance. He tore his hand out of her, and stepped out of her personal space. **_

"_**Put your clothes back on. I will make sure you stay pure, Quinn. I will not let a boy corrupt you, or your future. If I see any more of the marks he's made, I will see to it that he never sees you again." **_

_**He turned on his heel and left, and she crumpled to the floor and sobbed herself to sleep. **_

Things after that happened without her input. She did as she was told and never spoke a word about what happened again. They were the Fabrays. They were the family that set the standard; the family everyone else always admired for their solidarity. She was losing faith in her family. She remembered her Daddy happy, she remembers him un-soured. She always thinks back to the times he's made her feel safe. When he was the only knight she trusted to keep the monsters at bay.

Soon, he started becoming Russell.

He became someone she couldn't recognize anymore. He personified someone she was terrified of. She was afraid to do anything wrong; she was afraid she'd shame the family, and he'd come for her. He hit her when she wasn't at her best, so she kept herself on track. She worked harder than everyone around her and her paranoia began to corrupt her decisions. She couldn't lose control for fear of what Russell would do to her; for fear of what he _**could**_ do to her.

When things had been going well, when she was doing what she was supposed to, she let her guard fall and it all finally came crashing down around her.

"_**Finn, I have to go in, I'll be late for curfew." **_

_**He smiled that boyish smile. **_

"_**You're not even late yet, we still have twenty minutes and we are parked right outside your house. Come on… you know you want to." **_

_**She bit her lip. She leaned into him, and he cupped her cheek and they resumed kissing. He was caressing her neck, his giant hand smothering her face. She could feel the heat of the car choking her lungs, and her heart was pounding in her ears. She felt his other hand trail the inside of her thigh, and she knew she should stop him. When he paused for permission, she didn't tell him no. She was curious. She wanted to know how it felt. To be touched that way. She felt his fingers whisper over the cotton of her panties, and she let her eyes flutter closed. **_

_**The car door was wrenched open. **_

_**It was all a flash of cool air and shouting. Russell had her by the elbow, his other hand reaching in and grabbing her bag on the floor of the truck. They stormed into the house and he yanked her up the stairs and into her room. He dropped her on her bed and threw her bag against the opposite wall. She folded her hands in her lap and toyed with her fingers. She wasn't going to cry. She was going to take the beating she knew was coming. **_

"_**How long has this been going on, Lucy?" **_

"_**Please don't call me that."**_

_**His hand whipped out and knocked her backwards on the bed. **_

"_**At least Lucy knew how to conduct herself! Quinn is a whore!" **_

_**He was on top of her in seconds; he straddled her legs and began pulling her panties from under her Cheerios skirt. He bunched them in his hands, frowning down over her as he threw them in her face. **_

"_**They're wet Quinn. How long have you been whoring yourself out? Huh?" **_

_**He was hitting her. Smacking any open skin he could get his hands on. It was starting to ache, and her body didn't have much resistance left. She was crying. And she just knew… she knew her mother was sitting on the couch downstairs with her brandy and the television remote, trying her best to block out the noise of her screaming. Ignoring Quinn calling for her mother to help. To make him stop. **_

_**She can feel him grappling with her hips. **_

"_**You want to be a whore, Quinn? I'll treat you like one." **_

_**When he ripped into her he stole her breath away. She saw him above her. Hurting her in the worst way. Doing the bad things. She felt the warm trickle of something thick sliding her thighs, and she felt herself screaming. **_

_**But she couldn't hear it.**_

_**She starts to feel it. The burning singing flesh. Her purity. Her choice. She's still screaming when he pulled out of her; when he rolled off of her. She hears him leave, and cries in his wake. She cries herself to sleep and she doesn't wake up for two entire days. **_

_**Eight months later, her mother informs her of her father's affair. Russell wouldn't be coming back. **_


	2. Chapter 2

So this two shot just became a trilogy. I didn't want to rush it. I apologize for the tense this is written in. It's the only way I can get it out. Hopefully it works without being confusing. I put some scenes from Ballad, and some scenes from Journey. Hopefully my interpretations stay in character.

Please, read and review

Part II

She does repression well. She's made it easy in her life to forget things _temporarily_. She knows what it feels like to push something **bad** to the back of her mind; if only for a little while. She locks it in that foreboding closet at the back of her brain. It's the place with no fresh air and walls that close in tight around those nightmarish thoughts. And she makes the rest of her mind a clear, wide open space. She usually doesn't have to open it often. She only opens it when she has more skeletons to put away. Repression usually comes easy to her. But this time, what she can't forget is agony.

She remembers the days after like it was yesterday. She remembers waking up and being sore. She remembers the tender skin of her inner thighs that hurt to touch. She remembers getting up after being damn near unconscious for two entire days. She remembers the burgundy rust of the blood stain dried on her favorite yellow comforter. She remembers panicking. She moved faster than her burning muscles would allow. She showered, she cleaned and she cleansed. And when she was finished, she forgot.

Well, _she tried to_. She was terrified that things would keep getting worse, that he would keep coming back. But he never did. And she remembers needing to take refuge in someone else. Because should couldn't get the feeling of Russell being inside of her out of her muscle memory. She remembers what she did that day too.

"_**I can't do this." **_

_**She called Puck. She was bloated and she felt fat and she wanted to have a few drinks to forget a little more. He came easily. She just needed to feel better. To feel good. It had only been two weeks since it happened. And she couldn't get the feeling of him off her. She was going to call Finn. But she didn't want it to be a short, clumsy affair. She needed someone who would wipe away the bad things. She pushes her hand against him, half-heartedly and she urges him away. **_

"_**Yes, you can. Have another wine cooler."**_

_**He said it and she almost blanched. He reached over her to grab another, but she stopped him. She wanted to have sex. She needed it to be good, and she needed it to get it over with quickly. She needed to forget who had been there before. **_

"_**I'm president of the Celibacy Club. I took a vow."**_

_**She kept talking to him, her hand started to rub different parts of him. She didn't want to come off easy, it just wasn't in her nature. He took the bait. **_

"_**So did Santana and Brittany, and I did them."**_

"_**What about Finn? He's your best friend." She felt guilty momentarily, but shook her head as she stared into Puck's eyes. No one would ever know about any of this. She had to reassure herself. **_

"_**Come on. We're in high school. You think either one of us is going to give a damn about Finn in three years? Life's just a bunch of experiences, you know? You don't get a medal at the finish line for being good. You just get dead."**_

_**He had no moral compass. But she guessed; neither did she. **_

"_**Okay, but you can't tell anybody. I can't lose my rep."**_

_**It was all she had anymore. **_

"_**Our secret, baby."**_

_**He starts kissing her again. She suddenly remembers what she's about to do and she stops him. **_

"_**What about protection?"**_

"_**I got it, trust me. This isn't just another hookup for me."**_

_**She's sort of flattered. **_

"_**Tell me one more time."**_

"_**You're not fat."**_

_**And just like that, it started. She lay beneath him as he kissed her, occasionally kissing him back as he tried to work her body into relaxation. She was tense at first, lying there in her Cheerios top and her panties. When he asked about the bruises on her thighs, she nervously smirked and told him that it was from being tossed all day at practice. **_

_**When he's inside of her, she feels the condom breaking. She feels it rubbing defiantly against her dry insides and she feels it snap. Moments later he's rolling off of her. It doesn't look like any has spilled, so she stands up and she grabs a towel. **_

_**All she muttered to him on the way to her bathroom was, "Lock the door on your way out." **_

She remembers how it felt like she wasn't erasing anything. She was just adding layers. When she missed her period that weekend, she panicked. She drove a county over to buy her pregnancy tests, all six of them. And she cried in a truck stop bathroom when they all came back positive.

She remembers thinking that it could still be Pucks. The free clinic was sterile and grey. Crying babies and teenage mothers littered the waiting rooms, and she sat in her seat until the doctor called out the alias she had given them. When the doctor told her she was four weeks along she remembers crying for Russell's baby, she remembers hating her father more than she had ever hated anything in her life.

She remembers lying to Finn. Her oafish, simple, Finn. She remembers making up some stupid lie to protect her dignity. She remembers him believing her. What would they say if they found out? How would they look at her if they knew she was carrying her father's child? How would they judge her… Finn followed. Finn believed her and put up with her and she loved him so much during that time. Because he was willing to believe the lies she told him. And he pretended all the way until that inevitable night happened.

"_**There must be some sort of mistake here, Quinnie we raised you right…" **_

_**She sat still on that couch. This wasn't how this was supposed to be addressed. She was supposed to tell Russell what he had done in private. But Finn had decided to be an idiot. And she was nervous about what was about to happen. Finn's talking snapped her from her thoughts. **_

"_**You did… we didn't even have sex."**_

_**She looked away from her mother then, choosing not to address her father directly. He knew. He looked directly at her and she saw the air thunder from his chest. He knew what he had done, and she was terrified at what he'd be capable of doing tonight. **_

"_**I'm sorry, can we just stop with the lying, please." Judy continues, fraudulently calm. **_

_**Finn interrupts her, his absolute ignorance of everything mocking his sincerity. **_

"—_**But, I"**_

_**Her father is looking at her. He's looking at her like he remembers those times he used to be her hero. He looks like his remembering a really good thought, his gruff voice quiets the rest of the room. **_

"_**You were about five years old. I took you and your sister down to an Indians game. All the other dads brought their sons. But my two girls were enough for me."**_

_**He's sober. He's looking right at her and there are tears in his eyes and she thinks that he might be remourseful, that he'll take care of the baby inside her that's not supposed to be there. Like he'll make all these bad things he did to her go away. **_

"_**Daddy…" **_

_**She's crying heavily. She's shaking and she's begging him with every tear to not get upset. **_

_**He keeps talking over her sobs.**_

"_**Your sister made it through the whole game. But you fell asleep in my lap…" **_

_**She snaps to her mother, who's looking upon him like she knows he'll do the right thing. Judy's dabbing at her false tears like Russell is about to redeem himself. **_

"… _**I kept hoping nothing exciting would happen," Judy has this grin on her face like she's proud, because he remembers what they were like when they were really a family, "…Cause I didn't want the crowd to get too loud... And wake you up." **_

_**He looks at her. He looks at her and he sees her like she's the nostalgia he's feeling. He looks at her like she's that tiny little girl again, who stops the world when she's sleeping in his arms. **_

"_**You stayed asleep in my arms until the game ended."**_

"_**Daddy I'm so sorry…" **_

_**Russell takes a deep breath. Its long and it steadies him, and she's waiting. She doesn't know what she should expect. He points at Finn. **_

"_**You need to leave."**_

_**She can't let him leave. She's terrified that if Finn leaves the house, he'll beat the baby out of her. Finn was the model guy to take on such an important role. This way they could hide it, and no one would ever know. She holds onto Finn's arm, and she doesn't let him leave. **_

"_**Wait. Please Daddy can we talk about this?" She's clutching onto Finn like he's a lifeline. He settles into his seat and she thanks him in her mind a thousand times over. It wasn't his burden. But she couldn't do this alone. "Finn is a good guy! He loves me."**_

_**She's nodding, and she's hoping that he can understand. She's hoping that he's being logical and he can see that this is better. That this is easier. **_

"_**You too."**_

_**She almost doesn't understand what he means. He's staring at his hands and her mother's eyes lock to him quickly. She was a fool for believing that he would accept her. Judy was a fool for believing that her husband was anything less than a monster. **_

_**She's crying louder, and she doesn't know if she's ready to say the sins he committed out loud. Because beneath the monster she remembers her Daddy. She can't condemn him… because she'd condemn herself too. **_

"_**Get out of my house." In that moment, she considers just running. He looks sinister. His temples are protruding like devil horns, his mouth is so upturned she feels like she's the stench he can't stop smelling. Finn breaks the moment. **_

"—_**But you can't do that, she didn't do anything wrong!"**_

_**He's your sweet, simple Finn. He doesn't know any better, and she'd be taken with his chivalry had she not just been evicted. **_

_**Russell inhales deeply. **_

"_**Please, Mrs. Fabray DO something?"**_

_**He gets up and he moves to her. She stays quiet. Judy always stays quiet. **_

"_**Don't bother Finn, if she wanted to do something she would've when she found out that I was pregnant." She laughs through her words, at her sorry excuse for a mother **_

_**Russell turns to Judy; disgusted. **_

"_**You knew?**_

_**Of course she knew. She heard the noises. She must have come to Quinn's room and saw what he did. Judy had known for a long time what had been going on, and she never stopped it. She suddenly blinked. Judy had been repressing. Like good little Fabrays do. She finally joins the conversation. **_

"_**I—no —she didn't tell me anything. **_

"_**But you knew…" Quinn continued. **_

_**Judy is shocked. She's never accused her of the neglect Judy was so guilty of. She could bring down this entire family. The truth would destroy them completely. But what would she have left?**_

"…_**And I needed you. I needed my mom," Judy looks away, like she can't accept the accusation because she knows it's true, "And you were so scared of what he would do if he found out that you just pushed it aside like we do every bad feeling in this house. If you don't talk about it, it doesn't exist—"**_

"_**Now do not turn this on us!" His shouting scares her. This is usually when she gets it; she gets beaten when he can't control his building anger.**_

"_**You are the disappointment here!"**_

_**Maybe this is her way out. Maybe this is her open opportunity. **_

" _**Why? Because I'm not a little girl anymore?" She pauses, daring him to answer her. **_

"_**Because I made a mistake?" He made it seem like everything she did was wrong; but none of this was her fault anymore. This shouldn't be her burden. **_

"_**Who are you? I don't recognize you at all." He's quiet when he says it. **_

"_**I'm your daughter…who loves you and I know this must be really hard for you, but I just need my daddy to hold me, and tell me that it's gonna be okay." **_

_**Russell pinches the corners of his eyes and walks around the table and up to her. She's breathing heavily, and she can't stop the tension building as he walks up to her calmly. He won't hit her in front of Finn. He won't leave any more evidence of what he truly is. **_

"_**Please?" She asks him nicely. They can all pretend he didn't do this. They can help her take care of her child and they could pretend that Finn was the father. At least her baby could be loved. At least things would appear to be okay." He seems like her old Daddy. He's not allowed to be disappointed in something he did. A crime he committed. Maybe it was time she just let him go. She needed to stop loving this monster of a man. She needed to stop protecting him. **_

_**He walks away from her, he abandons her; their baby. She only cries harder. She wants to shout the truth into the open air. She wants him to fess up to HIS mistake. She needs him to step up and accept that this is his consequence. Not hers. **_

"_**Judy!"**_

_**He calls from the kitchen, Judy follows dumbly and she doesn't look back. She remembers the last thing she thinks is, "Fuck em all."**_

Repression is hard when there is evidence. It's hard to forget something that makes its presence known. She moved a lot in the time it took for Beth to gestate inside of her. Every kick was a reminder of why she didn't have a home. Every doctor's appointment rubbed the lack of love in her face. She wandered from Finn, to Puck, and finally Mercedes—she stopped unpacking her suitcase a long time ago. She prayed for God to help her. She read her bible and she prayed for everything to somehow go back to how it was before. She reads about the problems her baby could have. And she listens to Puck's song about naming her Beth. She decided to do it afterwards, because she owed him for the lie she continued to tell him.

She remembers the day Beth was born. She remembers the competition, the excitement, the adrenaline. There wasn't a moment she thought her water would break. At least, not while she was performing.

"_**Quinnie?" **_

_**She heard her name and broke off instantly from everyone else. She checked back twice to make sure they weren't listening. She didn't know what this visit was for. **_

"_**Mom? What are you doing here? Is Dad okay…?"**_

_**Some part of her wished him dead every day. Other parts still cared that he was her father, that she still loved him**_

"_**I came to hear you sing. You were wonderful. I'm-I'm so sorry I missed all the other times you performed. Were there a lot?" She was still in shock. She had never expected to see her again. She had been forgetting about the family that just pushed her out. **_

"_**I left your father. Well, I-I… kicked him out, actually. He was having an affair with some, um… tattooed freak. Quinnie, I want you to come home with me. I can turn the guest room into a nursery. Oh, sweetie, say something."**_

"_**My water just broke." **_

She remembered the pain that followed. She remembered only taking her mother's plea for another chance because she was in pain. She _**needed**_ her mother there… because she was still her mother, and all she wanted was someone to be there to help her through this. Someone who'd gone through _**this**_ themselves once upon a time. Her natural birth was the most realistic thing to happen to her. And no matter how much shame she felt for lying to Finn, no matter how much guilt she was leaving with Puck, she smiled into her daughters face and she forgave her father.

From what he did to her; came a beautiful thing.

She couldn't forget this. This wasn't a bad thing. This wasn't a mistake. She wasn't a mistake.

And what she remembers most about holding her for the first time is this:

Beth is perfect.

She has ten fingers and ten toes. She has a beautiful, healthy brain and no physical deformities. She can see and she can hear and she is innocent. She also has Russell's nose, her eyes and Russell's chin. She's pleasantly plump and she'll probably be chubby for a little while in life. For a moment she holds her child and she stares in to her daughter's eyes and forgives her father for every sin that lead up to this birth. But only for a moment does she feel that pure elation. Then she remembers that she has to give her baby to someone who won't hurt her. To someone who will love her without conditions. And she let her go.

When she sees her all clean and warm in her cubby through the glass, she remembers her. She knew she was making the right decision. This little girl would never have to worry about the monster that conceived her. She never had to live up to those unobtainable expectations. She would get to grow and live her life untouched by the atrocities of her origin. And she wouldn't believe in the monsters in the world.

She still remembers the conversation she had with Puck before they finalized the papers.

_**"She looks like you. Do you want to keep her?" He was smiling through the glass. He didn't know he was an imposter. **_

"_**No. Do you? She was telling the truth. Beth had so much potential. She wanted her to go on and never know of a Fabray. **_

_**Puck is quiet. She knows he wants to keep her, to raise her. She knows in that moment that Puck will grow into a fine man one day.**_

_**"Did you love me?" She needed the validation. That someone still loved her; if anyone ever did.**_

_**"Yes. Especially now." Her face betrays her. She wants to tell him the truth, to release him from this unwarranted burden. But she lets him live in this lie for a bit longer. She'll tell him one day. When she'd healed. Or even when she's just forgotten. **_

She remembers it all like it was yesterday. It's been a year. It's been a year she's gotten to live and she's loved every moment of it. She finds herself thinking of her mistakes. Of his mistakes. But she finds herself dealing with everything he has left behind. And she's starting to get back the things she's wanted. Since New York she's had her friends. Since last year, she's had her mother. Judy. She watched her mother grow from a frightened and obedient wife into a caring and independent woman. She hadn't quite forgiven her, but she appreciates the progress. She hasn't righted all of her wrongs, but she's accepting that she can't repress things forever. This summer, would be summer she made things right.

She'd been washing the dishes when she heard the door. She heard her mother giggling and muffled sounds of someone else. She was dating and she was working toward finding an equal; but things had never moved this fast. She'd been at the sink for over an hour, thinking about the past two years of her life. She washed and rinsed and dried dishes, thinking about the freedom of the years that were coming.

She turned around to greet her mother and listened to the plate she was holding crash against the kitchen floor.

"Quinnie, be careful! You could cut yourself. Sit down sweetie." She ushered her into one of the dinette chairs in the kitchen.

"What's he doing here?"

Russell was smirking at her, playing with the keys in his pocket. She felt like she was dreaming. She felt like this couldn't be real and she was just daydreaming at the kitchen sink.

She pinched herself, until her mother startled her out of her thoughts. Judy was sweeping the shattered glass into the dustpan, and scooping it into the trash.

"Well, I hadn't expected you to be in here when we got home, but I guess I'll tell you now."

Her mother straightened out her dress and beamed at her.

"Your father has been seeing a therapist… and we've been talking about reconciling."

She was staring between Russell and her mother incredulously.

"I've stopped drinking, Quinnie. And… I've ended my affair. Things will be different, I promise. Things will be better."

All she wanted to do was get up, and get her halfway packed suitcase.

And so she did.

End. Part II.


	3. Chapter 3

This may be longer than intended… this prompt is writing itself.

Part Three

She went directly to her room and began tossing odds and ends into her mostly packed suitcase. It wasn't even a suitcase. It was giant Cheerios duffel that strapped to her back, military style. She went about the room, dumping in handfuls of clean underwear and bare essentials. She grabbed her tooth brush, her bible, and the only picture of Beth she owned before crawling into the space beneath her bed to retrieve the green shoe box. It was tucked behind a few others and discreetly tapped shut. She popped open the lid and tucked last summer's earnings into the zip panel of her bag.

She'd gotten a job the year before. She worked as much as she could; and she saved almost eighty percent of it. She'd only worked at the store because she needed to pay her left over hospital bills, and she was sick of being someone else's burden. She had about two thousand dollars. She could stay at the motel at least a couple months—or until she picked up work. She'd gotten so used to quick getaways. She remembers one getaway the most.

_**She was so ashamed. Finn hadn't said anything to her after the fight he'd had with Puck earlier that day. Puck drove her to Finn's after school and promised to wait outside while she packed. Finn awkwardly stood in the doorway and watched her, his arms crossed tightly across his heaving chest. She could tell how upset he was, but she could also tell how relieved he'd been under the anger. **_

"_**How could you do this, Quinn?" It wasn't Finn's voice that interrupted the daze she was in; it was Carol's. **_

"_**I… I'm really sorry, Mrs. Hudson…" **_

_**Carol looked at her incredulously. **_

"_**Did you know? Did you know this entire time, Quinn?" Carol nearly whispered the question. **_

_**She was tugging on her fingers, unable to look the older woman in the eye. She was standing there, shocked into silence. She could tell Carol who fathered her baby and maybe they would understand why she lied. Maybe they wouldn't be as angry if they knew-**_

"—_**Of course she knew! At least Puck actually got to have sex with her!" **_

_**Carol stared open mouthed at first Finn, and then her. She shook her head and began looking at Quinn with such disapproval that she felt humiliated; she felt embarrassed for herself. She began tossing her things into her bag haphazardly, crying silent tears as she took the only mementoes of her presence from the Hudson guest room. Carol stood momentarily, watching her pack her things, before she rounded the bed and gripped Quinn by the shoulders. **_

"_**How—How could you? Carol was searching her face with such intensity that she was uncomfortable under her gaze. There wasn't anger on her face anymore, only an erratic sense of concern. Carole frowned and brought her hand up to cup her face. Carol wiped away the still falling tears and spoke quietly.**_

"_**Quinn, are you… are you protecting someone? Are you afraid of something… of somebody? You've been here for a little while now. I've watched you with my son, and I haven't doubted your feelings for him… not once. There must be a reason, child. Tell me, please Quinn; if there's a reason?"**_

_**Carol wasn't blaming her. She wasn't blaming her and she wasn't judging her. Carol Hudson was a mother. She was a loving, caring mother who had a sense of understanding. They were standing there, Carol holding her face in her hands and comforting her. She couldn't force herself to speak. Maybe… maybe if she told she'd be forgiven. But she couldn't. She had to run away from the ridicule, from the talks and the whispers. She needed to avoid everyone's disgust. The same disgust she'd had for herself since 'it' happened. She didn't think she could get through that. **_

_**So she got away from it. **_

_**She tore away from Carol, grabbing the last of her things and stalking toward the door. Let them think whatever they think. She could be a liar; it was better than what Russell had forced her to be. **_

_**She stopped.**_

"_**Finn. I never meant to hurt you, and I'm sorry." She fixed her eyes to the floor and forced her way out of the Hudson's house. **_

She settled into the Puckerman house that same night. It was unfamiliar and it was uninviting. But she just wanted to have a home. And for the past year, she'd gotten to go home, with her mother and make new memories. And now she had to leave again. She was sitting in front of her bed, thinking about everything she kept having to endure. She had zipped the bag closed, and all she had to do was leave. She stood. She put her bag over her shoulder and was about to turn around, but a hand reached out to touch her.

"Quinnie. Don't go. He's not moving in."

She sighed and put her bag down.

"It's inevitable, mother. I c-can't let him beat me down again. I can't try to be perfect anymore."

Her mother tilted her head.

"It won't be that way sweetheart. He… he's gotten help. If God can forgive him, why can't we?"

She flinched away from her mother. This wasn't going to happen. Things wouldn't just snap back to how they'd been.

"He beat me! He tore me down day by day and then he **raped** me!" Her hand flew to her mouth the second after the words tumbled out. It was the first time she'd admitted anything of the sort out loud. It was the first time she'd even said anything to her mother about it. They never talked about anything. It was easier to put away the problems than to discuss them.

She took a step back, dropping down to the bed and rubbing her hands over her face. Her mother was by her side almost instantly, trying her best to rub comfort into the bend of her slouched back.

"I've loved your father all my life, Quinn. He's all I ever wanted… and all I've ever known. There was a time when I would do anything he asked of me, without hesitation. I've been married to that man for such a long time that I—I became an extension of him. Every time he's hit you, Quinn," Judy curled a finger beneath her chin, "I wished that it was me. Every time I saw him push you- I wish I had courage to push him away. W-what he did to you cannot be undone. But…we can help him get better. Everyone deserves a second chance."

Quinn laughed. The brittle sound was desperate and hopeless. She kept putting her faith in these shallow people.

"How can you say that? How can you tell me that but tell me that you're just going to let him come back. After everything!"

"Quinn. He came to me and he told me the truth. He told me what happened, and he showed me how he got help. He's sick, Quinn. He needed time to fix himself and he's gotten it. He's stopped drinking and he's going to therapy and he's trying to fix what he's done wrong! I'm supposed to be here through thick and thin. I won't let him do that to you again. I won't let him do that to us. But he is still your father. We've both made mistakes… you've forgiven me for mine…"

She hated her mother in that moment. She was choosing that beast over her. She wasn't going to let her guard down anymore. She wasn't going to take anything without a fight.

"Please, sweetheart. Give our family a chance… give your father a chance. We'll take it slow. He'll work for it. I promise. It'll be better this time."

She stood, tugging her bag back over her shoulders and adjusting the straps. She'd tasted freedom. She lived a life without being afraid. And she wasn't going back. She turned back to her mother. Judy was sitting on her bed with her hands folded in her lap. She had tears in her eyes and she was trying her best to blink them away before they fell. Judy reached out to her, but she quickly retreated.

"I hope he's worth it. You two are made for each other."

She left.

000 0000 000

She had her cell phone clenched in her hand as she walked. She didn't know who she could call yet; but she was ready in case she needed to call someone quickly. She'd been walking for five minutes before she realized she was being followed. She could hear the purr of a motor following her down the dark street. She didn't turn around, but she made a left turn, then a right, and walked straight before zigzagging into a park. She was sure he was speeding up to keep up with her haphazard path. She could guess who it was without turning around. She didn't want to find out why Russell was following her.

She picked up her pace.

She heard his footsteps bounding on the pavement, and she held her breath when she felt him grip her elbow. She quickly unclipped the straps on the front of her duffel and tore away from him. She heard him throw the bag and chase behind her, and she hoped she was faster than her father was. She felt her heart gunning in her ears as she ran toward a field of high trees. She could smell the Earth, trudging through brush as she got closer. She didn't dare turn behind her to see if he was still trying to catch her. She was almost close enough to disappear into the dark, right before her foot caught on a crawling branch. She fell. She fell hard. Before she could actually push herself back to her feet, she felt her father's harsh hold. Russell was panting and grunting in her ear, and he wasn't putting her down.

It was the first time in her life that she was truly afraid of him; of what he would do.

She began fighting him. She fought him even though the ache in her ankle was straining against her muscles while she flailed. She heard herself screaming all the way to the car as he thrust her into the back seat. He sat on her legs as he got in beside her, and pressed the key lock in his pocket. They sat in the car for a few moments. She could hear their heavy breathing and she watched as Russell slicked his hair back into place. He took off his wedding ring.

"Why did you make this so _hard_, Quinn? Huh?"

He smacked the side of her face with the back of his hand. She felt the tears burning her eyes. She felt like a sardine inside of a can. He was sitting on her legs on the other side of the slide-in seat. She tried the handle and died a little inside when she realized he'd enabled the child lock from his keyless entry. She didn't know what he was about to do, but she knew that he was nearly breaking her knees where he sat.

"Now. I came to talk to you. This is going to go smoothly. You're mother takes me back and we smile for the fucking cameras for the Christmas cards this year. Nothing happened last year and we'll go back to being a family. Now get your bag from outside and let's go."

She wasn't about to let this happen. She would let him beat her to death before she got dragged into that house again. She turned to look at him; it was orange in the cab of the car. The shifty streetlight was casting a sinister glow over Russell's features in the backseat of the parked Jaguar.

She spit in his face. She watched his face contort and he lunged toward her, his fists smashing against any open parts of her body. She took the opportunity and pulled her knees up to her chin as he tried to hit her repeatedly in the tight space. He was getting tired; she was waiting for an opening. She remembered the technique Coach Sylvester had taught her. She felt him sit back off her and she thrust her palm upward into his nose. The nose he'd broken repeatedly in his lifetime. She felt him pull back to cup his bleeding nose, the blood dotting on some of her clothes. She struggled from underneath him. He was tired and he was lightheaded. She had a few moments.

She tumbled up to the front driver's seat of the car and fell out of the open door. She tried frantically to find her bag. She couldn't see it. And she realized just then that her limping with the weight on her ankle wouldn't help either. She began to run. She staggered into the street and ran-limped down the road until she saw houses. She knew there was someone in the neighborhood she could go to. She couldn't let him find her and she was running out of time before he came to get her.

She looked up driveways and tried to discern where she was. Her face was swelling slightly and she felt the blood on her lips. She couldn't tell if it was hers or Russell's. She made a point to wipe it away. She saw someone walking out to the recycle bin ahead of her. She heard the roar of Russell's car and she could feel the rev of the engine as it got closer to her. He turned off his lights and pulled the car over to the side of the road. She could see the tiny person coming in clear. It was Rachel. Rachel Berry. She was putting out the recyclables in the front of her fence. She tore to her in a last ditch of adrenaline, and threw a look over her shoulder to make sure Russell had at least taken the time to compose himself. He was always about appearances.

"Berry… Rachel! I need your help!" She grabbed her hands and led her towards her own front door, closing it behind them and peeking outside through the blinds.

"Quinn, what's going on? What happened? Who did this? Are you okay? Let me get my Dads—"

The smaller girl dashed away from her and up a flight of steps. She took the time to catch her breath and settle her heaving ribcage. The trio quickly climbed down the staircase, and up to the shaking blonde.

"Please, he's coming after me and he's going to come up to the door and he'll make me go back with him, and I really can't and I just need to hide somewhere until he leaves—"

The taller man put his hands warmly on her shoulders.

"Calm down. Just… let us call the police, Quinn, and everything will be okay—"

She tore away from him and stood against a door offset in their foyer. No one knew what went on the Fabray house. She was not going back and she couldn't be taken away— she'd probably wind up somewhere worse. She shook her head. She had to tell them something… before he knocked on their door.

"Just, please. Don't call the cops… and don't let him take me!"

She was pleading and she wasn't ashamed. He was going to kill her when he found her. She'd worry about the police and social services tomorrow. Right now she just needed time to think.

There was a knock on the door.

She stared at the Berry men and Rachel. They were looking among themselves. Suddenly, she was thrust into the door she was standing against, and Rachel pressed a finger against her mouth as the taller Berry man answered the door. She could faintly hear muffled talking. She was trying to be quiet, but she was suddenly quite aware that she was inside of a closet. She began to breathe a little heavier, and she couldn't help but quietly slink to the floor, into a small tight ball.

_**She was in eighth grade. She'd joined the junior volleyball team, but she was still having a hard time with the other girls on the team. She was their best server, but the girls had shunned her since the first day she joined. She'd gotten into a fight with one of the girls, and she had been assigned to ball duty after school. She'd been putting the practice balls into one of the big metal chests in the back of the equipment room. **_

_**The lights flicked off and she turned quickly to see if anyone was standing by the door. She couldn't see anything without her glasses. She was pushed into the metal chest and she heard the thundering sound of it being locked. It was a tight fit, and with the dark outside, she couldn't see light through hinges of the chest. **_

_**They were laughing and the noise was echoing through the chest. She couldn't breathe and she felt like the oxygen left was scarce. Soon, it was quiet. And she was afraid they'd leave her in there overnight. **_

_**She was wrong. **_

_**She heard the first thing strike the tiny box, and she began banging her fists against the closed lid. She was crying, and she felt like she'd die in that extra small box. The balls moved around her and she started freaking out. It sounded like they were hitting the chest with baseball bats. The noises were coming from everywhere, and it was reverberating through the metal like sonic blasts to her ears. Suddenly it stopped, and she heard the latch unlock. She stayed in the chest and rocked herself to sleep. She wandered home two hours later and never told her parents. **_

Someone was holding her. Someone was rocking with her, and they were warm and tight around her. She opened her eyes, and stared quietly into the light wandering into the open closet door. She wondered who's breaths were that loud in the open doorway, and stared wide eyed at the small family surrounding her when she realized the culprit. She pushed away from Rachel abruptly and stood on shaky legs.

"I-I don't know what you told him, but thank you. I'll just get out of your way."

The shorter Berry man stepped in front of the door. He put his hand in front of him to stop her from leaving.

"You're staying here tonight. And maybe tomorrow. That man is… that man is not fit."

It was settled. She had one night to think. But first, she had to get her bag.

A/N: Please review.


	4. Chapter 4

There will be a slightly different feel to things this chapter… more interaction—less history. Hopefully I keep you guys on board. Thanks for all of the reviews, alerts and favorites.

Part Four

It was so dark outside since she got cleaned up that they had to take flashlights to the park. She was wearing a baggy t-shirt donated by Mr. Jacob, the man in the wire framed glasses just a bit taller than her. She'd iced her ankle for a half hour before begging the Berry men to help her find her bag. Rachel decided to come along and be an extra pair of eyes. She didn't know what to say to any of them. Her quiet thank you's didn't seem good enough, and they would save the talking for another day when they weren't so tired.

She and Mr. Jacob went through the brush twice and up the trail to the field of trees she almost made it to before Russell stole her back to the car. They made it close to the street when she'd decided that he must have come back to get her things. That he took everything she owned back with him so she'd have to come and get it. She started crying. She didn't know what she would do without any of her things. Her savings. Rachel and Mr. Maurice were huddled low to the ground closer to the driveway for cars near the park. Mr. Maurice stood tall and waved over to them as he slung her bag over his shoulder.

She breathed a deep sigh of relief, and wiped the wetness off her face before they could all notice it in the dark. She had to cough to clear her throat before whispering her thanks to them all. They loaded into the car and made their way back to the Berry house. The men apologized to her for not having the guest room ready because of their indecisive redecoration efforts. They left her in Rachel's room with the girl, and she didn't know what to say to her. She put her bag down on the floor and stood in place near the now closed door.

"I'll take the floor… May I have a blanket, I can use my bag and—"

Rachel stood up and tilted her head toward her bed.

"My bed is big enough to share, Quinn. The bathroom is through there, use anything you need."

She nodded and lugged her bag into the bathroom and closed the door behind her. She was instantly happy that it was summer time. And she could lick her wounds in private. She slowly peeled the clothes away from her tender skin and made a job of showering. She knew it was awfully late, but she couldn't sleep with the grime seeping into her skin. She cried in the shower a few minutes and pulled a towel from out of the bottom of her bag. She brushed her teeth and dried her hair before dressing in a pair of pajama pants and a tank top. She couldn't hide the bruises on her arms and she hoped the girl in the adjacent room wouldn't want to talk about anything because she didn't think she'd be able to handle it.

She opened the door to the blissfully dark room and pushed her bag against the writing desk near the wall. She slipped underneath the blankets and listened to the hum of the central air conditioning. The brunette broke the silence.

"Everything is going to be alright, Quinn."

She felt the girl snake her hand into hers beneath the covers, and she tried to sleep. She wasn't prone to nightmares. Sleep was a reprieve when her reality was frightening on a daily basis. But she couldn't relax. Letting her guard down was one of the most difficult things to do; her body often fought forms of comfort. She lay rigid beside the brunette, and she tried to force herself to sleep in a bed that she was imposing on.

"I'm sorry. To bring you into this. It isn't your burden."

Rachel lay beside her quietly. Rachel's back was facing her and she was breathing evenly. She slowly tossed her head over her shoulder to look at her.

"Don't apologize for seeking help, Quinn..."

Rachel turned her head away and settled into the mattress. She closed her eyes as soon as the brunette let go of her hand. And she tried to sleep again. She should have been tired enough to drift off quickly. She should have been exhausted enough to forget about all the things she was running from. But this was proving to be the only time she couldn't push away the bad things.

_**She was in front of the Fabray house. The lights lit the path to the front door, and the downstairs was lit softly against closed curtains. She was abruptly inside the house and she heard the wailing coming from the top of the steps. She saw Judy sitting on the couch, crying silently with the television remote squeezed between her conflicting fingers. She followed her own screaming to her bedroom. **_

_**She doesn't remember opening the door. She's suddenly just there, watching what happens from somewhere else. He is over her, struggling with her flailing limbs, his hair unsettling on the top of his head. He's standing between her thighs and he's trying to keep her still enough to unbuckle his pants. She's screaming, and it is loud and unwavering. She doesn't know why she isn't trying to stop him. Instead she goes to sit on her own bed, next to the two of them and she watches. She starts to notice the things she hadn't noticed before. He grimaces when he forces himself inside of her. There is no pleasure, there is no gratification. He does it like it needs to be done, like it's a punishment he's served her a thousand times. He's muttering slurs under his breath beneath the screaming, and he's rocking into her broken body without thought. The screaming is almost impossible to take. **_

_**Her voice is raw and she is hoarse and she watches herself pleading for him to stop. Because it hurts. She never realized how helpless she sounded. She never heard the words she screamed out at him when he did this to her. She never knew that it lasted this long either. She watches from the head of her bed as he continues to assault her. She sees the red around the parts of him she should have never seen. She looks into her father's eyes and she wonders where this monster came from. **_

_**There is so much anger in his face. There is so much disappointment. She wants to grab her own hand, but she isn't sure she'd be able to grasp anything… because this wasn't real. Suddenly he is buckling under his own weight. He's finished. She decides to reach out to herself. She decides to stop herself from screaming and comfort herself. Her hand is so close to reaching out—but the screaming abruptly stops. **_

_**The silence makes the air thick to breathe. The part of her that is broken on that bed turns to her. At the same moment she can hear Russell at her doorway. They two people in front of her speak at the same time: **_

"_**This is all your fault." **_

And then she's awake. She's awake and there are lights on everywhere and there are people around her. They are huddled around her, concerned. She doesn't know why they are here, and she can't fathom the reason they are all staring at her but they are. Mr. Maurice has a tall glass of water in his hand and Rachel is standing behind Mr. Jacob with her hands fisted in his t-shirt. She rarely has nightmares. She usually sleeps without burdens and she makes it through the night avoiding her thoughts. Tonight she wasn't so lucky. She's wet. Her skin is dripping with sweat and she can feel her hair gathered and stuck to her forehead and her neck. Her tank top is almost see through. She doesn't know what to say. She doesn't know what she has to explain.

"Since no one is sleeping… how about we go downstairs and have some tea…"

Mr. Jacob was out of the room before anyone could say anything. She realized then that it wasn't a question. She stood, avoiding the eyes of the remaining people in the room and made her way to her bag. She pulled a t-shirt over her head and quietly padded downstairs.

Rachel hadn't come downstairs with her father when he made it to the kitchen. No one said anything to her as the kettle heated water for their tea. It wasn't until the bright yellow mug was put in front her that the silence of the room was broken.

"Quinn… we understand that you may not be ready to talk. And for the most part Maurice and I have been very understanding with what you have asked of us tonight. We haven't alerted the authorities and we are trying our best not to. But… we need to know who we are protecting here, Quinn."

She gulped at her tea even though it was still too hot. She tried to think of words to answer his question, but Mr. Maurice spoke before she could get the words out.

"Your screaming woke us up. We tried to get you up. But then you started saying things. Awful things that didn't happen tonight. Bad things that could very well put your father away for a very long time. We don't want to keep making assumptions, Quinn. But we are starting to worry that we are keeping your secret for all the wrong reasons."

She stopped toying with the rim of her mug long enough to actually answer the men this time.

"I-I shouldn't have come here. I'm sorry. I just… I couldn't go back there knowing he'd be there and I saw Rachel. I'm sorry about tonight I didn't mean for that to happen and… I won't take up anymore of your time. I'll be on my way—"

She pushed her seat away from the table. They both stared at her momentarily before jumping back into their conversation.

"Quinn, we didn't say you had to leave. We are very adamant about you staying actually. We won't feel comfortable about letting you go back after… discovering what has been happening—"

She suddenly felt defensive.

"Mr. Maurice that only happened once—he didn't; that wasn't… he mostly hit me when I got out of line."

Mr. Jacob scooted his seat closer to her and put his hand soothingly on top of hers.

"Quinn… something like that… should never happen. He shouldn't hit you; period. He shouldn't… he should never take advantage of you that way… and he should definitely be prosecuted for those kinds of crimes. No excuses."

She simply nodded. She felt like she should feel some type of relief. She felt like she should be happy that maybe things like this would stop happening to her. But all she could feel was this sense of shame. She'd be the one to break up her entire family. She'd be the one to condemn the Fabrays to scandal.

"What happens now? I don't want to… I don't think I'm ready to tell anyone about this."

Mr. Jacob rubbed his tired face before answering. He didn't look as jolly without his glasses on.

"Now… you drink your tea. We can't force you to take action, Quinn. You can stay here for as long as you need to. We have no problems with that. We want to help you, Quinn. None of this is your fault, understand that. Just… sleep on it okay? And if you can't sleep—sip your tea and watch tv until tomorrow. But think about it. This will never stop happening if you don't report him—"

"And if he comes to our house again, we will press charges. We have no legal ties to you. Your mother and father can legally come to get you tomorrow if they so feel. I doubt your father will try it… but—we will figure out everything when everyone is well rested. Deal?"

She nodded slowly, staring at her now empty tea cup. The two men ushered her quietly into the living room and left her with the remote and a glass of water. She wasn't thirsty anymore. But she sat on the couch in front of the glow coming from the television set. She wasn't tired and her face and arms were burning a bit. She was so out of it that she hadn't felt the couch dip beside her.

"We're friends now, right Quinn? Last summer… we spent a lot of time together, right?"

She was tired of talking. But the quiet in the brunette's voice made her hesitate pushing her away. She nodded again, her lips pursed in quiet affirmation.

"Why… why didn't you say anything? Why couldn't you talk to anybody?"

She shrugged her shoulders.

"I… guess it was private, Rachel. I mean. He's my father and this is my family that I'll ruin if I tell anyone—"

Rachel stopped her.

"You aren't going to report him? Aren't you afraid? Shouldn't he pay for what he did? What about your mother does she know?"

She put her hands up to stop her from talking.

"Rachel… there are a lot of things you don't know. There are a lot of things you won't understand. My father used to be my hero and I'm still adjusting to him just being this big villain out of nowhere. When it….when it got really bad I got away. I got away tonight and I've been managing only having myself."

Rachel was shaking her head erratically.

"But you don't have to manage on your own. I would have helped, Noah would have helped—Santana and Brittany would have helped! You have to tell, Quinn. He'll never let you go if you don't."

She was staring at her. She didn't know why this mattered to Rachel. It infuriated and touched her simultaneously. Her voice was quiet and completely serious. She was losing her temper and trying to push away the tiny girl sitting beside her.

"No one knows about any of this. And I was just supposed to tell Santana and Brittany that my father beat the shit out of me? Santana has her own problems and Brittany is oblivious. These are my problems, Rachel. You think I could have told Puck? You wanted me to tell Puck that my father raped me and is really Beth's biological father—"

She jumped from the couch. That wasn't supposed to come out. No one was supposed to know that. That was her secret. She felt herself crying and her body was shaking. Without pause Rachel was standing in front of her, wrapping her arms around her and letting her cry into the crook of her neck. Rachel was stroking her hair and quieting the noises that were ripping from her convulsing body. They scooted back to the couch and she cried in front of the glow of the television set. Rachel held her until she couldn't cry anymore.

They fell asleep that way.


End file.
